Reform Jewish
WEDDING TRADITIONS
If you're going to have a Reform Jewish wedding, you'll want to have more than just a rabbi ... you'll want to include some Jewish traditions as well. When we discuss how you want your wedding to be, we'll review some Reform Jewish wedding traditions that you may want to incorporate into your ceremony. These religious and cultural traditions add meaning to your ceremony and connect you to generations of Jewish couples who began their lives together.
Ketubah
The ketubah, the marriage contract, was traditionally considered a revolutionary concept, protecting the bride's rights and obligating the husband to look out for her welfare. Today the ketubah reflects the equality of you and your spouse and your mutual obligations to each other. Your ketubah doesn't need to be elaborate or expensive. The particulars of the design or artwork should reflect your personal preferences and personality. However, for a Reform Jewish wedding, the text of the ketubah must be Reform/Egalitarian and the Hebrew translation must directly match the English words. If I perform your wedding, you can send me a copy of your ketubah for verification if you are concerned.
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Bedeken
Before the ketubah is signed, the groom lifts the bride's veil to ensure that she is, in fact, his bride, and then he lowers it again over her face. The veil symbolizes modesty and reinforces that however attractive physical appearances may be, the soul and character are the most important.
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Chuppah
The wedding ceremony takes place under the chuppah, or wedding canopy: a symbol of the home to be built and shared by the couple. The chuppah is open on all sides to remind us to open our home and hearts to friends and relatives with unconditional hospitality.
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Betrothal & Kiddushin
A Reform Jewish wedding has two parts. The first is the Betrothal, or Erusin, which establishes the binding commitment of two people. The Betrothal ceremony contains a blessing over the first cup of wine, followed by another blessing in praise of God, who brought the couple together, and establishes this rite of marriage as a holy commitment under the chuppah, the wedding canopy. The couple drinks from the same cup of wine to represent the life that hey will share from this day forward.
The second part of the ceremony is the Sanctification, or Kiddushin. During this portion of the service, the couple exchanges rings. Accepting the ring in front of witnesses is one of the acts that makes the marriage legal under Jewish law. Seven blessings, or the Sheva Berachot, are then recited over the second cup of wine. These blessings praise God for creation; for human life; for the bride; for the groom; for fertility and children; and for the companionship and joy of the two people together. Kiddushin consecrates the bride and groom to each other.
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Breaking of the Glass
The last act of your Jewish wedding is the smashing of the glass. The sound of the breaking glass reminds us that even as we celebrate our moment of great joy, we remember that there are still imperfections in the world. The broken glass is a reminder of the destruction of the Temple in Jerusalem. The fragility of the glass also suggests the fragility of human relationships. Even the strongest love is subject to disintegration. In this context, the glasses is broken to protect and celebrate the marriage.
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Yichud
The Yichud is a seclusion that takes place immediately after the ceremony. You and your spouse will retreat to a private space to share your first few moments alone as husband and wife.
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Celebration
According to Jewish tradition, rejoicing with a couple on their wedding day is a special mitzvah. Everyone will be very excited and honored to celebrate with you and share your joy!
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Checklist
